Williams Charisma Journal

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This topic contains 16 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  William 2 years, 6 months ago.

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  • #964

    William
    Participant

    Since Luke doesn’t seem to be interested to fill his diary with entries, I will put the most entertaining or hardest changes I will encounter into this journal. With pretty good english, writing probably after parties at nearly 2am. Enjoy!

  • #965

    William
    Participant

    30.9 to 1.10
    4 People (of which I would say 2 know the old me well?) were having their birthdayparty together today. It was pretty neat! I was totally energized after drinking: Nothing and shouting AWESOME in my car with a big smile (after doing the hour of power for 15 minutes each day for one week now and sentence completions for 5 weeks).
    So we had this awesome party with approx. 40 people who sort of all know each other… but not me. Well, let’s change that! After appearing an hour late I get out of my car and start with a very energetic opening “I FINALLY FOUND THE PLACE, FUCK YEAH!”, continued by shouting greetings and shaking hands with the people I surprisingly knew(mostly no names though). Fast forward, after getting many nice conversations with the people mentioned below and literally speaking to EVERYONE at least once, I start dancing, doing a handstand-contest (2 people participated, including me!), dance more, speak to a recovering drug addict who wants to get me a place at a university for acting(AWESOME) since I can be so hyper without being on drugs or other stuff. Then I talk with more and more people, get nice conversations with strangers who start telling me their lifestories and decide to leave after some dude decided to put Tekke and bad Pop up(really, really bad music) and some funny dude decided to put a carton for bananas on the car of another dude(maybe his own car?), because it would look funny and that guy parked right where everybody wanted to stand.
    As I am saying by to everybody, I get stuck with the group I initinally started with right next to that car. And then some 100kg 1.80m guy comes over, knocks off that carton(which made that car look like a cab actually, so it was kinda funny) and starts to seek a fight with us. After trying the “Dude, that’s funny” stuff and trying to change the topic, he was still enraged after someone had fun with his friends car. But the other guys diffused the situation and I departed.

    So after that story I wanted to know from you, Charlie, if you can tell me how to deal with drunk people that just want to fight? Just walking away doesnt seem to work and logic isn’t the thing either. Eye contact and calm speaking didn’t help too. So what would you suggest?

    Names of the people i conversed with(‘*’ says i knew them prior, ‘+’ means i knew them prior for more than 2 meetings of 5 minutes): Nick’+’, Willy’+’, Max’+’, Johanna’*’, Markus’*’, Ricky’*’, Anse’*’, Stefan’+’, Phillip, Florian, Karen, Benedikt, Katha, Helena, Emma, Josi, Emilia, Tom, Tom Hermann, Emily, and many more whose name I didn’t ask.
    Honestly, I could still give 80% of those people their names now. Not those girls that were like “oh, you can dance” and had very boring conversations “Go, Dance, Will.I.Am!”, which are up there too.

    PS: I don’t drink. I never drank. I was always hyped up (after being shy till 7th grade), but negative the other times. I was not liked. I used the hype with the opinion “i must find it funny”, but in groups I just tried to be the clown, resulting in nobody liking or respecting me. So I think I have improved TONS now. I was the guy with the russian hat at school. No seriousness ever.

  • #969

    Charlie
    Keymaster

    Sounds like aside from the near fight everything went really well! I think the biggest thing is that you got yourself into a good mood at the beginning and then that momentum carried over into a lot of your interactions.

    As for drunk people, man that is hard. You did the right thing which is to convey super positive body language to him. A big smile and a genuine apology (sometimes even if you didn’t do anything wrong) can often distract them for long enough that they wander off. You can also shake their hand, ask their name, and show interest in them for 30 seconds. Drunk people often are craving attention and that can calm them down.

    Sometimes though, people just want to fight. I’ve seen it before. So if everything above doesn’t work, don’t let your ego get in the way. Just get out of there.

  • #972

    William
    Participant

    Thanks, I’ll try that.

  • #1011

    William
    Participant

    Ufff… totally forgot about this one.
    University started and I’m being totally hyped up all the time(not faking it) and am probably the most well known “Ersti”(first semester dude) there is. I’m trying to chat up everyone, greet everyone with an energetic “Hola!” in this 7000people university but just don’t get the hang of it… Most people are either closed, just want to drink or are boring.
    So I’m on my way all the time and chatting up people that seem interesting to me(to the degree that people come over to me like: “Hey, are you William? I know you!”(well, i don’t know you yet :])) but can’t get the hang to stay in the conversations. Yes, I have my circle of 3 buddies atm, but most of the time I meet people at parties, which is kinda bad. Why? I can’t talk there. I can only dance. Yesterday evening a girl was looking at me, I chatted her up with “hey, you can’t look at me like that and don’t say hi!” and she revealed to me, that her friends thought of me as an awkward person. Not that it gets to me, I’ve adopted one of Dale Carnegies mentalities (“Do what you want to do from your heart. Critics come any way”), but this seems to kick off a lot of people, as I am a crazy dancer and the video of DrugsLabs about Ecstasy has shown me that this is pretty much how I look like. I won’t stop doing what I do, but this is nagging me

    The worst thing however is a mistake I made starting on day one. I went to a group of people, chatted with them and as soon as they seemed to have lost interest, I walked away to the next group. THIS became a habit. Now I am getting invited into groups of girls and somehow get away once the attention is gone, most of the time in clubs because they become boring to me. Now I have like 30 numbers here, and no clue to
    a)Who which belongs
    b)What I should do with them
    The plan was to get as many contacts as possible, but that seems to have backfired, as I have no real contacts(just those other 3 buddies) now, just people I know at parties. Now when I try to focus on one person, it still isn’t that interesting, as women are like cats(Corey Wayne) and I seem to have adopted that mentality to do as I please as soon as someone gets boring.
    How do I get more intimate with those people?

    I didn’t feel bad before writing this, but now I’m once again getting that I have way to high standards for my life(which is quite good imo) which are not fulfilled. Yet, my current lifestyle at university is waaaaaay better than that of most other students(beer grabbing and doing the bionic sea horse, hanging with mental terrorists and not being able to houdini yourself into the clubs like I do(HA!), though they wont vampire themselves like me 1am after dancing too heavily.)(This was for you, Omar;))

    Background: In highschool I didn’t have many friends at all. One, to be clear. So I am getting more social now. As you may have seen, my nearly 3 months with CU, Tony Robbins, Dale Carnegie and Nathaniel Branden(soon Les Brown too) have helped me tons- Or the people are simply more open here.

    William.

    PS: I messed up the First Impressions order some times. They asked me if I was a psychiatrist or why I am asking such questions and don’t do smalltalk. Is that good?
    PPS: In Germany there is an app, called “Jodel” for Students so everybody knows what is going on on the campus… On Thursday I was acting like an AMW student(the most feminine course in our university, with 50% womens rate[technichal university…] and now someone is totally convinced I am an AMW-student and that i should please report back. They just don’t believe it’s me. And like EVERYBODY in that Jodel is telling the person it’s me. So much to being known 😉

  • #1014

    Charlie
    Keymaster

    In terms of getting numbers, I would only get them if you actually plan on calling that person. There is no use in collecting them so only ask if you have something in mind you’d like to invite that person to. That way you don’t clog up your phone and you’ll build friendships as opposed to just acquaintances 🙂

  • #1016

    William
    Participant

    A revelation just happened to me (I hope that’s the right word, it sounds so awesome). I was coming back from dancing lessons and was singing la vaca mu! and asking a women if she knew the song and if she wanted to dance merengue to it. She didn’t want to learn it, she is “finally done with work today and just wants to sleep now”. I asked her, what good it is to just live for working and she had no better answer than “well, you have to work”. I left her after this and decided to write this as soon as i get on the pc. It happened 7mins ago 😀

    So most people really just live for the sake of… being not dead, but being only empty husks. Also, Justin Biebers “Everybody gets high sometimes, you know”, seems to apply to my everyday live at university all the time now. That’s good! Some people ask me why I am happy to have lessons at 9am(dude, that’s the perfect time) and why I am so energized in the morning, “I would waste all my energy already in the morning!. They won’t believe me when I tell them that a day of no energy leads to an evening of no energy, so I let those boring people(as I said, the other students of IT are boring) be and hang out with the energizers…

    Good Night, William.

    PS: Go and start dancing Zouk. It’s awesome!

    • #1018

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Yeah a lot of people don’t realize that exerting energy on things you like often creates MORE energy. Sitting around trying to conserve energy drains it really fast

  • #1029

    William
    Participant

    Okay. After once again speaking to strangers in the train last week (and changing my style significanlty, i am now wearing a melon[hat] and look pretty unique- like an artist, everywhere!), one of them asked me when I’d be in the city again. Since this was obviously an “I can’t wait to see you again!” message, we decided to meet up on Friday(yesterday). And boy, it was awesome. While ice-skating, we had a blast with each other and I realized that the words of Corey Wayne were totally right:
    1) If the woman has a high attraction level towards you, she will make the date easy for you and go along
    2) Don’t act needy (the same stuff you said in your last video I guess)

    In comparison to the date one week prior with another chica, this was 100 times better, if not even more. She told me probably the best compliment I’ve ever heard and I know that it was sincere:
    “You know, on the day you started talking to me on the train, I was nagged by a creepy dude on the trainstation who said he needed money for a trainticket to visit his mother. After giving him some money, primarily for him to go away from me, my friends were nagging me that he will for sure go and buy cigs now. I just thought that it doesn’t matter, but maybe it would boost my Karma a bit. And then, out of nowhere you talked to me on the train and were so amazing. I am really thankful for that day and meeting you, I couldn’t stop grinning for the whole day and my mother was extremely worried about my unusual behaviour- You are my gift.
    After you initiated the meeting, I was like ‘omg, I’m so excited for friday’ every single moment this week(actually, she kind off initiated the meeting by accident :D) and now I’m here and loving the time I have with you. Thank you.”

    Yeah, so the evening ended with some kisses and we’ll have our next date next week. So yeah, I think all those personal enhancement books and you, Charlie, have helped me quite a lot. Especially since I’m feeling like the only person at this university(technical university, full of nerds) that is able to chat up strangers, even girls!

    Okay, let’s await the next success stories.

  • #1286

    William
    Participant

    Procrastination got me. Sorry. Here, from the best story email.

    Hola Charlie! And a happy new year, may it the best year there was yet!

    I’ve thought quite some time now about an awesome story for you, so I thought I’d just write you down a part of my path, especially everything that alligned to this evening.

    In August I started my lessons from you for a big amount of money(heck, I’d work nearly 2 months for that), thinking that I’d probably refund it by the start of October, getting all lessons and still having my money, boy how wrong I was! YOU changed my LIFE with all your lessons. YOU got me started on everything! I’d dreamt on being a slave to computers as I’d call that profession now, somehow hoping I wouldn’t have to work with computers later. Sadly, I had already enrolled for university by that time and couldn’t apply/go for a year abroad anymore, but that’s not the story.

    I was somewhat socially awkward. People didn’t like me at school, my life was boring, which is why I decided that I MUST get a change. But how? I was always thinking “If somebody asked you for a superpower, what would it be?” That I’d take quicksaving with loading and multiple saveslots and if that didn’t work: Become the most charismatic person on earth. Well, after I watched Lie to Me, got into Microexpressions, after that into Body Language(Really boring written books by joe navarro), I found a book about Charisma by Olivia Fox Cabane. After getting into it quite a bit, while not getting hooked, I was talking with friends about the topic, was searching for charisma on youtube and found you. I was astonished by the videos, yet couldn’t apply the stuff that easily(end of may’16) so I somehow studied all the videos without implementing it. Long story short, after 2 months you got me with the promotional offer after I’ve said to a friend “If this is down to 300€, I’ll take it.” And since you taught me integrity and that stuff, I just couldn’t let this chance slip. I’m so glad I didn’t!

    By learning from you in the last 2 months before university, I enhanced. I read the books, did all the daily tasks(well, those without a camera…) and have been sloppy on the course since University started. BUT, in the first week of university, the “Erstiwoche” as we call it, I’ve gone all out. I went partying every time I could, tried to meet as many people as possible, well you know the story from the forum(do you..?) and am by now probably the most known “Ersti”(first semester student) on this university. Quite awesome!
    Yet, today, on Silvester, I was alone, because everyone has gone “home”. Going to the hill where the university is located to see the fireworks, I’d gotten quite… negative about what a waste of money that must be. But just when I was about to go home, I met a friend from dancing, a really awesome dude! He then introduced me to his friends, or no, rather his friends introduced themselves as they have already heard of me. “Yeah, you’re William, aren’t you? How awesome! I saw you dance like crazy at the M15 (a 10 people flat that hosted a party in the Erstiwoche)! Glad to meet you!”

    Quite an awesome feeling, I must say. After meeting them, they invited me to their houseparty which was quite amazing I have to say! We did amazing things, though more the drunkards than me, but it was still a totally amazing evening!

    What I want to say with this is, that if you are just always positive, energetic, open to meet new people, outstanding and totally extroverted(Well, I’m the only person wearing a melon[not the fruit]) Karma or whatever you may call it WILL get back to you in a positive way. People will recognize you, invite you to parties and you will always enhance. And you WILL enhance, if you don’t procrastinate or give in to the peer pressure of alcohol.

    But what now? Currently, we have a break from University. I’m reading “Rich Dad – Poor Dad” from Robert T. Kiyosaki, quite awesome and restructuring for me. I’m also getting more into the psychology areas and will probably not study informatics for much longer. I’m becoming somewhat of a capitalist by all those american influences, including you, and am going to America next year, or well, this year by now :D, for Work and Travel! You may visit me in the Glacier National Park(which lodge I don’t know yet though) in late August or the whole September, would be awesome to meet you! Thank you for killing my fear for applying for it and also eliminating my hardcore money saving plans, Charlie.

  • #1343

    William
    Participant

    So after getting declined a “job” for the university sports centre, I decided to foolishly try to apply for a business psychology course of study, as it seems to be the nearest field of study to Charisma and selfdevelopment(well, maybe social psychology is next to it), just as a try. I could lose nothing. Well, turns out my great high school degree told them I’m an awesome dude and that they would love it if I threw away Computer Sciences for Informatics. Well, I’m moving away from my home territory now. Very far away!
    See what you did there, Charlie? You changed the course of my life! Thank you, it’s awesome.(Is it?) Now I’m going to use this leverage to move to Bonn and live the dream(which one?) there.

    Just wanted to tell you all in this forum that you changed my life. First by bringing me to apply for work and travel in the USA, now for changing Universities. You all rock! I’m trying things I NEVER EVER would’ve done just 9 months ago. I was born anew(haha, geddit?) by this University. And probably Tony Robbins, Gary Vee, Tim Ferris(4HWW) and all those awesome authors of books that all trace back to business psychology.

    Good night from me for now, let’s see when I feel like writing again. 😀

    William

  • #1344

    William
    Participant

    “if I threw away Computer Sciences for Informatics” for Business Psychology. Sorry, my mistake 😉

    Also, how do I find my dreams? What I want to do in the future? Or most of all: The Idea for the 4HWW? It is keeping my mind occupied since at least a month now 😀

    • #1345

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      That’s great man! I’m so happy to hear that.

      In terms of your dreams, I think you start with one project that interests you. Like you said, the 4HWW is great for guidance in setting up small businesses. I would start pick one idea and see where it takes you – that’s where Charisma on Command was born 🙂

  • #1384

    William
    Participant

    Today, I’ll get to know quite a few new people. Probably the ones I’ll be studying with. So in order to be the best version of myself I’m not putting any pressure on myself (like Cal Fussman did in his Interview with one dude, as mentioned on the tim ferris show) and still try to enhance the experience. I’m going to use all the info I’ve got from you and will see what will happen. If I wont update this thread this week, you can assume they ate me. They probably will, I mean: Business Psychologists?! Only crazy people are going to study this 😛

    Also, yesterday I’ve read “The Miracle Morning” from Hal Elrod in one go. Awesome book, really inspiring and made me wake up at 5 am SUMMERTIME(! that’s 4 am two days ago) and do my first morning routine. It was awesome, you should get into it! He has many appetizers on his page miraclemorning.com (should be the url).
    And for the first time in ages, I’m not tired after waking up! I get up after 6 hours of sleep, in the middle of the night and am up- the fuck is that?! I’ve finally found a morning routine with the Life S.A.V.E.R.S.! Great stuff. 🙂

    Write you soon(as always, hahaha…)
    Will.I.Am.

    • #1387

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Haha, awesome stuff man! I’ll check out that book and can’t wait to hear how you week goes!

  • #1401

    William
    Participant

    Oh. My. God! Today I met a dude studying the same stuff I do, however he first studied acting and is doing the university now while working as an actor. If that isn’t enough, he was training on Shaolin Monks for 8 months a few years ago and seems to be into self-developement!
    How did I get into the talk? He was annoyed by the loud people in the room and I told him afterwards that it was good of him he told them to shut up, as it reminded me of the course. After that we got into a talk and I revealed my interest in Charisma, on which he recommended me Charisma on Command! That was sooo funny! Also, we later went around and recommended you to students, some said most people analyzing are somewhat quacks or what the word is in english(“Heinis” in german xD) to which he just said that you are different, you do it so focused, so bundled, professionally and right!

    I just had to tell you this Charlie, you also connect people now! 😀

    Also, on Monday nothing happened. The event was yesterday and with enough alcohol in the other people, everybody got really, really communicative. Went good, my reasons for not drinking were accepted(?!) and I made some buddies, if they can remember me after that amount of alc. So the week was a success, after the failed Monday to Thursday afternoon. Thanks for everything!

    William

  • #1408

    William
    Participant

    So two friends were celebrating their birthdays yesterday in Cologne, one of THE Party cities in Germany, which was totally awesome, while culture-shocking me with things I only thought would be in NYC(Promoters for clubs?!).
    But before the evening, I realized that you made a new module! Awesome! I can only say: Yes, the commitment really works and is TOTALLY worth it for everyone that might be reading this, it changed my life!
    Back to the evening: Reinforced with the mindsets in my mind again(priming, combine it with self-fulfilling prophecies) I thought we should just ROCK the clubs, which totally worked. We loved it! We were dancing like crazy, basically creating something like a dancing circle(that vanished once we were gone :P) and making people stare at us with the question, as someone asked me, “you did throw something, amirite?”(LSD BRO?)
    SO that was pretty awesome! Sadly, however, but it was not the goal, I did not talk to many new people, I didn’t try though. So that was pretty neutral for me.
    Lastly, I was totally flabbergasted by the fact that one girl just waved me to her with the questions “hey, who are you? how old? number?”, which was pretty amusing, given the fact that nobody even dares to do this. Respect to her! Corey Wayne really helps, if we would just act accordingly.

    So thanks again Charlie! The mindsets will also help very much, es grande! 😀

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About The Author

William

After enrolling to study Computer Sciences I've started with CU. It changed my life! I am now studying Business Psychology, meeting new people on a daily basis and try to connect with as many friends as possible. Also, CU gave me the courage to apply for Work and Travel on the other side of the planet :D