daily journal from europa

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This topic contains 25 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  A guy from Europa 2 years, 4 months ago.

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  • #1369

    Week 1, Monday – First Impression

    So, the goal for today was to be better than good. My first struggle was to translate sentences like “I am fantastic” into my own language. That said, I came out with a few ideas I was looking forward to testing.

    The first test was at the bank. I hoped to see a positive reaction in the face of the customer assistant. It was a terrible moment. I came up with my best-trained smile and said “Hello, how do you do? ” She didn’t even looked up at her screen and continued typing some text for ten seconds.

    I didn’t want to stop the exercise here. I was actually feeling better than good and in a very good mood. The second test was in an office. That worked better ! I put on my best smile and all my passion in order to start the conversation. I answered that I was feeling awesome, and I managed to have a small talk with the sales assistant of a small shop, and I realised a face changed during the first seconds of the conversation when she realised that I was looking into her eyes when I was speaking.

    The last test of the day (lazy student’s day without a Monday course) was my first rehearsal with a music group. I introduced myself with a nice smile, answered the how do you do question with “I haven’t been as excited as today for ages. I am thrilled to start playing music with you”. For the change in their face. It was weird for them that I gave a handshake to all of them. It is something we are not used to here. But after my answer (and I hope my enthusiasm), we started to talk like friends and played music for many hours.

    So that was for day one:
    +++ : I am feeling better good

    ~ : It is uncomfortable for me to show off this enthusiasm because I was always to kind of shiny guy.

    Thanks for the course and see you

  • #1372

    Week 1, Tuesday: first impression

    All right, this was a crazy day. The daily goal was to build trust. So I set up my trigger early in the morning: I imagined my classroom with all my classmates. We do not speak a lot together in the morning, and each one tries to look like he is busy as we are waiting for the course. So I imagined myself going into the classroom, go and handshake some of my nearest friends, feeling better than good, big smile, etc. But as I came into the class…

    I saw nobody! I totally forgot that this particular teacher was not here this week. No course in the morning for me. I went to the cafeteria and met a friend who was in a group. I wanted to introduce myself to them at first, but they were working on complicated exercises, so I decided to keep quiet and worked in my little corner.

    Later this day, I met my best friends for lunch. After the failures of this morning, I decided to go and handshake each of them one by one. They looked surprised, but I noticed a mind shift (smile) on some of the faces (2 out of 5).

    At the end of the day, I took the bus back home. Usually, nobody speaks in the public transport where I live. I saw, however, an old “friend” and decided to go and talk with him. I was a great bus journey (although I am looking forward to seeing the course “expert conversation”, I failed to apply the “velcro technique” to build a “self-driving” conversation).

    So to sum up:
    +++ I always keep in one corner of my head all the stuff with “be better than good”. This lead me to feel globally less tired and more excited about all I am doing.

    +++ I realised that my comfort zone is very tiny and that I have a lot of work to do to let me speak with people I don’t know so well.

    +++ I realised that talking on the bus with someone I don’t know so well doesn’t kill me.

    — I failed to introduce myself into a new group

    — I still feel uncomfortable going round the table and handshake everyone sitting around it.

  • #1373

    Week 1, Wednesday: first impression
    (I replaced the names of the towns to keep some anonymity, it is normal if they sound crazy)

    Where are you from?
    I am from Trujikisti, a small town in the middle of Agastraga, but I had to move here one year ago to go to university. It is great to live in a big city with all those interesting things to do, but actually, I am also missing the “village spirit” of my hometown, where I was almost sure to meet someone I knew at each café!

    1.I am wondering if this is not a to long answer for a simple question like “where are you from”
    2. I tried to leave an open loop with “all those interesting things to do” and the comparison between big and small cities, but doesn’t sound it a little bit artificial ?

    • #1374

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Great stuff Romain! The number one thing I would recommend to you is to not be too self-critical. It’s not a failure if people don’t respond well every time. Sometimes people are in bad moods, sometimes no one is in the class. As long as you continue with the exercises you’re on the right track!

      I think your answer to “Where are you from?” is great. The only thing I might add is one of the things you love to do in the big city, but that isn’t 100% necessary. It’s definitely not too long. People will be happy you’re giving them something to respond to

  • #1377

    Week 1, Thursday: first impression

    Thank you, Charlie, knowing that you read and follow your students is a great source of motivation !

    What do you do?
    Well, I try to find answers to questions nobody knew about in a way that nobody understands.
    Haha, oh really?
    Yeah, I am a physic student. I will stop you right now, all of us are not like “Sheldon from BigBang theory”! I just like solving general problems and then see how the solutions can have powerful impacts in our lives (we wouldn’t have smartphones or even computers without quantum mechanics). I hope to join a big company like Facebook or Google after my studies. They run all kind of crazy projects that can change the world.

    • #1378

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Excellent answer! Wouldn’t change a thing 🙂

  • #1379

    Week 1, Friday: first impression

    Already the last day of this first excellent week! I had a great opportunity to apply the eye contact exercise. Indeed, I met a new teacher at university who will coach me in different practical works. The session began with a lot of theoretical questions, and I managed to answer most of them without breaking the eye contact. Usually, I just give the answer in this kind of conversation. This time, however, it was harder to remember them. So I just said my thinking process loudly. This lead to a real discussion rather than a Q&A session.

    Sum up of the week:
    Two positive points:
    1) Feel better than good: this is the best advice I am taking with me this week! When I said that to me, even if there is nobody around to meet, I feel more passionate and have more fun doing what I have to do.

    2) Will smith’s entry is something I will watch before each party of networking events. It puts me in an excellent mood.

    One little problem:
    3) The Russel Brand leading conversation video is fun and describes what is happening very well, but it didn’t help me understand how to lead discussions. I hope that this will come up in the expert conversation module! In between, I will continue to work on the “velcro” technic!

    Thanks Charlie for this course, and see you next week !

    • #1380

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Yep, you’ll learn more in expert conversations on that for sure 🙂

  • #1383

    Week 2, Monday: confidence

    Hi,
    Yesterday at a bar, inspired by your videos, I started a conversation with the bartender. We spoke about the music, the bar and other superficial things. It was fun. I even asked him about his name. I think it has one of the first times in my life where I had a conversation with a bartender. A great step forward for little me 😀

    • #1385

      William
      Participant

      You are doing great! I’m loving the way you are doing this! Keep it up, you won’t be disappointed! 😀
      Glad you are having fun =D

      • #1388

        Thanks, William! It seems that you are also doing great! I am not as far away as you are, but I will definitely do my best to take the most of Charlie’s lessons! Thank you for your encouragement!

  • #1389

    Week 2, Tuesday: confidence

    Charlie, I have got two words to say: “THANK YOU”.

    Tonight was my roommate’s boyfriend’s birthday. He invited me, and there were twenty people I didn’t know and one old friend who tends to intimates me when I was younger. I didn’t see for many years.

    I know that I usually go to those events, and stupidly smile while I am listening to the other people. Then I generally look at my phone and pretend some excuses to go back home. But the task of today was imagined myself doing such things and what it would like if I was confident. I just did my incantation (the song “Fox on the Run”) before I join the team, and then it was just amazing. I started by introducing myself to everyone (I came late because of one course). I would never have done that before. Then I sat down and began to speak with everyone. I ask them about their future dream job; we had great conversations. I also talked to the girl who intimated me when I was younger. I felt that she was happy to be introduced to the discussion. At midnight I made a speech in front of everyone: and pursued my roommate’s boyfriend to make a speech. It was the funniest moment of the evening.

    When I started the course, I didn’t believe it was going to help me. I just knew I had something to try to go beyond my shyness. I have spared the money for half a year and tried it. I don’t regret my choice. I have never felt that good in front of unknowns!

    I can’t wait for the next weeks!

    Thank you for that course!

  • #1390

    Week 2, Wednesday: confidence

    So today began with a failure. I wanted to speak with unknown people will I was waiting for the bus. I did not find the courage to start a conversation with them…

    It went better after that; I did something easier. I spoke during a break with a group of students I had never talked to. I had always taught I am not funny enough to speak with those guys, and felt very nervous about their reaction. The results, however, was very positive. We had a good time, and I found the tennis partner I was looking for.

    Charlie, do you have some practical tricks to start a conversation with strangers?

    • #1399

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      During the day it’s actually much easier when you think! Most people are extremely bored and will happily take an opportunity to talk. You have two main options

      Indirect: “Do you know when the bus is supposed to arrive?” or “Any idea if there is a good sushi spot nearby” these always get a response though they need a segue to something else which could be the following second option…

      Direct: “Where are you headed to (while at the bus station)?” or “I like your hat, are you a Cardinals fan?” These are clear you’re engaging the person in conversation.

  • #1402

    Thank you, I will try those!

    Week 2, Fryday: confidence

    This day is tough. What I realised reading my sentences, is that I am not pushing myself enough in many fields. Here are my goals:
    – Start the business that I have been thinking about for three years during my next holiday (something like in 3 weeks). I booked the whole holiday to prepare a smartphone app and a business plan. I invited a friend to work with me during the entire week.

    – I have plenty of little projects. I decided that I had to take at least one step for each of them each week. I wrote down all of them on a piece of paper and put it on the door of my room. I will write down one task for each project on Sunday evening, and I have to complete them during the week.

    – I want to put more efforts into my studies. I decided to put daily goals and to stay at the library until I completed them.

  • #1403

    Charlie
    Keymaster

    Brilliant stuff Romain! If you have any trouble with goal setting and achieving, let me know because that is an additional topic we can cover 🙂

  • #1404

    Charlie
    Keymaster

    Brilliant stuff Romain! If you have any trouble with goal setting and achieving, let me know because that is an additional topic we can cover 🙂

  • #1406

    Hi,

    I wasn’t very active this week. No valuable excuses of course… I just watched a lot of other videos on youtube, but I have to admit that without the exercises part, they are useless. I wanted to set goals and to have a vision for myself. The truth is that the only thing that helped me was to sit on a table with a piece of paper and a pen and write to myself. I eventually chose five topics I had to improve and wrote some “I must do” sentences. For example: “University”. I have to do at least one exercise and review one course per day. I have to be active during the courses and must be able to summarise the lesson at its end. I must… I will read this sentences each day when I wake up.

    Thanks to your new series of videos, “Mindsets”, I hope that I am back in the game. I loved mindset2! It helped me a lot to deal with one of my worst default.

  • #1411

    Week 3, Tuesday: Conversation

    The exercise from today could not have been on a better day. It was one of my best friend’s birthday, and he is abroad since two months. We keep in touch with text messages, but today I decided to phone him. I did the exercise and he laughed. We had a very good time and we both realised that phone calls are possible 😛

  • #1415

    Week 4, Wednesday: Conversation

    I was leading a funny and absurd conversation with a group of students yesterday. I did not know them well, but they invited me to one of their parties after this entertaining talk. I am looking forward to it 😀

    • #1416

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Nice! Have fun and keep us posted on how it goes!

  • #1418

    Week 3: recap

    This module was tough for me. I am not very good at comedy, and I usually speak in brief sentences. I think that I did not get as much as I wanted. I will continue the course and come back at the end. I will hopefully be more confident and will do the exercises in a more valuable way.

    What I learnt:
    – Gesture attracts attention
    – Have fun while speaking
    – Go with my story till the end, even if it seems to work

    What I disliked:
    – I somehow did not like the exercises of this week. But as I said, I will probably enjoy them more when I will come back.

    Let’s learn Storytelling! 😀

  • #1435

    Week 4, Monday. Storytelling

    Laziness has stopped me this month, but I am back. So today I had to tell one of my stories to the camera, and then work on it thanks to the worksheet. It was the first time I spoke to a camera, so the first story I told wasn’t captivating at all. I made the changes you suggested in the paper, and the second one was better. It is not perfect, but better. I will keep the structure of a good story and your tips in mind for the next times I will have to tell a story.

    PS: your video “how to master your mind” is great! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBIao6nI58o)

    • #1438

      Charlie
      Keymaster

      Glad you liked it. There will be A LOT more on this topic coming soon 🙂

  • #1439

    Week 4, Tuesday. Storytelling

    I wasn’t at home yesterday, so I could not film my introduction sentences. Instead, I tried a lot of different ones at a party and noticed the ones that worked and the ones that did not. It is the first time I realised how much it is important to get the attention before telling a story but I will not forget it.

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